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What Do You Say To Them?


James Portillo
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James Portillo

Whenever you overhear or get told directly something about fitness/exercise that you know is wrong or a misconception, what do you say to that person? How do you tell them the 'correct' bit of information without sounding condescending?

What I mean is: during a PT session one of the junior Marines says to me "your pull up form is okay but you're going too high at the top--all you're doing is wasting energy and it does nothing for you". Now, when I'm doing my PFT, that maybe makes sense but this is told me to me almost everytime I get up on the pull up bar and do sternum to bar form pull ups. At that point all I do is nod my head like I'm in agreement when I'm really not... lol.

 

It's like the classic "below parallel squats will destroy your knees" and "locking out your elbows in a push up is bad for your elbows". I'm just curious whether or not someone here has been in a similar situation?

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Alexander Svensson

I get this a lot actually, whether it's about strength training or nutrition when someone says something that I know is not correct then first I explain calmly that they might be wrong, or that what they believe is the right way may not be the only way to do things. If they still claim that they are right then I just let them think so.

I guess it depends on who the person is also, I'm not gonna go into a discussion about something with someone I barely know.

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ADRIANO FLORES CANO

Depends on the person. There are persons "open minded" and ready to absorb knowledge at any time, or at least to listen what you have to say with fully attention. On the contrary, there are persons that talk to you condescendingly from the first word, even if they are talk silly things and they don't know it.

 

With the first group, we sharing knowledge and they don't mind not knowing something about X, wich is why we can share them that bit of information. With the second group, I don't spend energy on them, it's like "Ok ;) ", or "I desagree with that", body language and face do the rest.

 

Like anything in life, depends on the person that is in front of you. We have to know how to make the most with our energy, we are wrong or not.

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FREDERIC DUPONT

In the MC, it is very simple:

1- Everyone above you is right and you are wrong!

2- Everyone below you is wrong and you are right!

3- If same rank, the stronger guy is right!

 

When you are back to civilization, we'll adjust that, but for the moment, it is enough! ;)

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If you even want to bother putting your energy into people like these come up with examples of people that are known  or professionals that probably taught you in the first place.

 

For example: Coach Sommer  US Jr National team coach in gymnastics taught me to do this way.

For your chin up you can always say: Arnold S. did them this way

For the Squat I usually say: How do you think people took dumps in the stone age or have a look att children when they play in the sand box.

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George Launchbury

If it's important to you to try and help said person (friend, relative, etc). You could open by explaining how surprised* you were to recently find some new research that seems to show [insert fact here]. That way they don't feel dumb for not knowing, and get all defensive. You can then explain the positive benefits you have noticed since adopting this new approach.

 

*Most likely you weren't actually recently surprised, but a well-meant ruse can put you both on the same side, and therefore smooth the way for open conversation.

 

For example, this morning whilst filling the car with fuel, a car pulled up behind me covered in snow. He'd basically put his windscreen wipers on and driven out of his driveway. It's 05:30 and dark, he can't see out of his car side/rear windows, and none of his lights or signals are visible. Basically he was being an irresponsible idiot and putting other road users at risk.

 

Telling someone they're an idiot is never a good way to open a conversation, so I explained that I was sorry to bother him, but last week my brother was pulled over by the police because he'd not cleared his car lights/windows properly. I then explained that it's really easy not to realise things like that as it snows so infrequently here.

 

He agreed, said thank you, and was clearing his car off as I drove away.

 

As has been stated - if you feel they're just not interested, you're not backed into a corner and can just go your seperate ways with no hard feelings. It might even be that they've learned something even more recently than you!!! :)

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I'll be interested to see what other comments you get on this.  Clearly, the only correct response above is Fred's....

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Joshua Naterman

Whenever you overhear or get told directly something about fitness/exercise that you know is wrong or a misconception, what do you say to that person? How do you tell them the 'correct' bit of information without sounding condescending?

What I mean is: during a PT session one of the junior Marines says to me "your pull up form is okay but you're going too high at the top--all you're doing is wasting energy and it does nothing for you". Now, when I'm doing my PFT, that maybe makes sense but this is told me to me almost everytime I get up on the pull up bar and do sternum to bar form pull ups. At that point all I do is nod my head like I'm in agreement when I'm really not... lol.

 

It's like the classic "below parallel squats will destroy your knees" and "locking out your elbows in a push up is bad for your elbows". I'm just curious whether or not someone here has been in a similar situation?

Don't even bother, the Marines is not known for recruiting based on intelligence :)

 

Fred's told you how it is.

 

Never argue with a Marine.

 

I "re-taught" a few when I was in the Navy, but I was bigger, stronger, and faster than all of the Marines I met by a fairly wide margin, and even then the only success I had was teaching them the right way to kick a leg. I did that by damaging their thighs with what were obviously not even close to real speed kicks. I'm still not convinced they didn't revert back to their nonsense eventually.

 

Even in the real world, it's not worth it most of the time.

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Stewart Whaley

The person that takes the time to "correct" you is going to be very unlikely to take your advice (they are already certain they are correct).

The only benefit I've ever gotten from "educating" someone is that they stop bothering me when I work out.

Very nice benefit, but certainly doesn't change anyone's mind.

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--Liten to what they say to make sure they don't have a point. 

--Smile (a real smile). 

--Say "yeah, I get what you mean, but I'm doing X because Y"  Make sure X sounds advanced and Y sounds authoritative.

          example: I'm doing chest to bar pull ups to work towards a muscle-up just like I learned in this great course I took from one of the Jr National Gymnastics Coaches...

--Exude relaxed confidence and continue.  Do not betray any sign of doubt or irritation, don't get into a who knows better contest.

 

If they are in a position where their advice is not just trying to limit you but is endangering someone who doesn't have as much knowledge try to bring up the issue once then go over their head.

 

PS It is frustrating! but I think the best response is to do what you do well and leave the nit-pickers on the bench. 

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Keilani Gutierrez

reading How to Win Friends and Influence People and Enrich your Personality have helped me A LOT in communication. I hope you find them helpful :)

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I have been avoiding that sort of conversation for many years now. Remember that while you know you're right, they know they're right, too. A lot of this stuff is pretty trivial and really not worth "arguing" about. My policy is not to give advice unless specifically asked to - or, if I really feel that I must, then I ask first if they want some tips.

 

Also I always try to frame things in a "well, this has worked for me" kind of way. And if it HASN'T worked for me then maybe I shouldn't be telling others to do it! With some exceptions.

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Joshua Slocum

Thank him for his advice, and tell him that you're explicitly doing bar-to-sternum pullups because [insert your reason here]. 

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James Portillo

All good responses, thank you all; yeah FiN, I figured as much that's the case lol. It's pretty easy to get that impression just being around Marines for even just 10 minutes at a time. In general, it makes sense that I would calmly thank them and tell them I'm doing X because of Y and it works for me but in my specific situation I guess I should just save energy and frustration and not try to argue with the junior Marines and recruiters.

It just can be a bit frustrating when you've been told more than a few times to "never go that high on your pull ups" when I know that they benefit me a lot more that way.

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Stefan Hinote

All good responses, thank you all; yeah FiN, I figured as much that's the case lol. It's pretty easy to get that impression just being around Marines for even just 10 minutes at a time. In general, it makes sense that I would calmly thank them and tell them I'm doing X because of Y and it works for me but in my specific situation I guess I should just save energy and frustration and not try to argue with the junior Marines and recruiters.

It just can be a bit frustrating when you've been told more than a few times to "never go that high on your pull ups" when I know that they benefit me a lot more that way.

 

 

All good responses, thank you all; yeah FiN, I figured as much that's the case lol. It's pretty easy to get that impression just being around Marines for even just 10 minutes at a time. In general, it makes sense that I would calmly thank them and tell them I'm doing X because of Y and it works for me but in my specific situation I guess I should just save energy and frustration and not try to argue with the junior Marines and recruiters.

It just can be a bit frustrating when you've been told more than a few times to "never go that high on your pull ups" when I know that they benefit me a lot more that way.

Ignorance is bliss. :)

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Oh yes, I run into this pretty much constantly.

 

Most recently it was with a former national strongman champion in his 40's (old roid wreck, too).

Needless to say, he didn't really give much of a *** as to what a little girl like myself had to say about training. He obviously knew everything...

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